Stanley: Does everybody know the deal by now? Don't try don't try looking us up in the phone book. And if Mr. Kincaid answers the phone, don't say anything about buying our movies on eBay. Copacetic?
Now, number one, I want everyone to know I consider it a personal affront that Jonah went out on a date with Rollergirl and left me in charge of selling these horror flicks. I haven't even seen most of these flicks! Number two, at this point I'm the only one here! Bill and Ted went over to Chandler's head shop to get high, Sam and her dumb raver friend Kyle left to go a rave, shit, there ain't nobody around. Nuthin' goin' on but the rent. What do I do when a customer comes in? Walk away from the computer, come back in twenty minutes and find someone's hacked into our store eBay account and stolen our identity so they could place bids on half the rare Beanie Baby collections up for auction today. Great. Okay, look, this video right here is a totally disposable film. Dolly Dearest, circa 1992. Maybe Mark Cage could tell you something about it, 'cuz it's a horror flick about a killer doll, slasher doll movie, right, like, a naked attempt to cash in on the whole Chucky craze. Which in my eyes wasn't even a phenomenon. I mean, why all the sequels? And Bride Of Chucky? Who went to see these movies?
(Stanley takes a breath.)
Stanley: They probably made dough, tho, since Chucky never got paid! HE'S A DOLL! That's some fucked up shit. If Chucky was black, he wouldn't have gone out like that. Tell you what, I'm gonna look on IMDB about this movie. Then I'll front like I know what I'm talking about. Psych! Fooled 'ya. I've seen Dolly Dearest, yeah, I have, I know every scene. Right on. This movie's actually got a political bent, as I remember it. This American family moves to Mexico because the Dad's gonna be the head boss man in charge of a new factory employing poor Mexicans making guess what...dolls. But check it, like in Poltergeist, those stupid gringo fucks built their NAFTA palace on an ancient Incan burial ground! The family's got a little girl named Jessica. Soon enough, Jessica's favorite doll turns into the doll from the toybox of evil. So it's got some centuries-old voodoo curse on it, and it wants to possess Jessica and suck her young little life up like a hoover. Rip Torn is in this flick. Hey, we all gotta eat. Look, if you're a fan of the killer doll horror category subgenre, this is right up your alley.
(Stanley takes another breath.)
Stanley: But definitely also check out Magic, with Anthony Hopkins, Anne Margaret, and Burgess Meredith, and Wicked Stepmother, with Bette Davis, directed by my man Larry Cohen. Technically, I guess that's not a killer doll flick, it's actually in the humans-reduced-to-dollsize-creatures horror/sci fi subgenre immortalized by flicks like The Incredible Shrinking Man. Or The Devil Doll, directed by Tod Browning, or the flick with the same name, from 1964, featuring Hugo, the evil ventriloquist's dummy, which is actually another bonafide evil doll movie. But the best one of all is Trilogy of Terror, from 1969, which was a trilogy. Actually, only the last episode was about a doll gone bad, I think it was called "Devil Doll," how original, with Karen Black getting the shit knocked out of her by an enraged African doll possessed by a badazz Zuni Warrior Spirit! They had one of the dolls used in this movie on public display for a long time at Universal Studios in Hollywood, and that sucker was scary-lookin'. But this movie right here, Dolly Dearest, this one might be doo-doo, it might not be, I don't really know, 'cuz like I said from the get-go, I haven't seen it. Oops. Forget I said that. Oh shit, here comes a customer now. So c'mon, bid on this!
You are bidding on a previous rental, used VHS videotape of Dolly Dearest (1992), EP mode, video released on Vidmark label, pictured below. Tape comes with original box, is in good condition and guaranteed to play. High bidder pays $3.50 S&H. Credit cards accepted using PayPal.
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Sold 7/26/00 @ $3.99
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