Ted: Dudes! Don't try looking us up in the phone book. And if Mr. Kincaid answers the phone, don't say anything about our eBay auctions. Okay?
Bill: How long have we been in here, Ted?
Ted: I don't know. I lost count a long time ago.
Bill: There's no way Jonah's still out there.
Ted: What, you think he forgot about us?
Bill: Duh! That guy's home in bed, or in that Rollergirl chick's bed, probably.
Ted: What are we gonna do? This is super-duper fucked up!
Bill: Oh, shit! We've got another problem, dude.
Ted: We're gonna starve to death in The Videodrome's break room. What else could go wrong?
Bill: Dude, look at the bag! Our kb's nearly gone!
Bill & Ted (looking at each other): Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!
Ted: Okay, man, let's not panic. KIT. Keep it together.
Bill: I've got it! We'll list a bunch of movies on eBay that some conspiracy theory-believing weirdo types out there will be looking for, they'll believe our story, call the cops, and get us rescued!
Ted: Yeah. Right.
Bill: It'll work, man! It's our only hope!
Ted: So what movie?
Bill: How about The Brady Bunch Movie!
Ted: Word! Hey, hang on, that isn't a strange, creepy cult film that any weirdos are gonna want. You're high, dude.
Bill: Don't you know anything? Why do you think none of the original Brady Bunch kids are in this movie, yet all the actors they used look suspiciously like Bradys?
Ted: Uh, that Sherwood Schwartz dude killed 'em off 'cuz they wanted syndication residuals?
Bill: No, you moron, it's because they cloned 'em! Back in '74, right when that stupid orange hair episode came out and the show went off the air.
Ted: Wow.
Bill: This movie was all part of Schwartz' master plan to invert the TV universe in the year 2001. Like, you know Michael McKean's in this movie.
Lenny? From Laverne & Shirley? You think this just a coincidence?
Ted: You're right dude, and Shelley Long plays Mrs. Brady! That's the chick from Cheers!
Bill: Eventually, they're gonna try and land the Bradys on Gilligan's Island!
Ted: For a three hour tour! Are you serious?
Bill: Dude, we've also got the sequel sitting right here. Let's sell that one in another auction and then I'll explain everything.
Ted: Word! Okay, eBay conspiracy people out there! We know you can hear us! Call the police in your area, and ask them to get in touch with Floyd Kincaid in Wilmington, Delaware, to tell him to come let us out of the break room!
Bill: You doofus! People, don't listen to him. You can call the cops, but don't call Mr. Kincaid. Look, just tell them about the movie.
Ted: The Brady Bunch Movie! Bradys meet the 90's! Jan's psychotic inner voice that wants her to kill Marcia! Cindy the tattle addict! Peter and Bobby ganging up to give Greg a well-deserved beatdown! (I wish.) Most plotlines from bad Brady Bunch episodes recycled and made to fit in ninety minutes! A must for secret Brady fans everywhere! So bid on it!
You are bidding on a previous rental, used VHS videotape of The Brady Bunch Movie (1995), SP mode, released on Paramount label. Tape comes with original box, is in good condition and guaranteed to play. High bidder pays $3.50 S&H. Credit cards accepted using PayPal.
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